Monday, March 13, 2006

Ow, Brain Cramp!

I can't for the life of me think of anything interesting to post about. This month is filled with doctors' appointments and BS mostly. I'm suppose to be cleaning while the hubby is at the dollar theatre with the younger two but I can't get my big butt off this chair. lol

Tomorrow I get to go for my wonderful check for cervical cancer. Oh fun! Am I worried? No even though it's very likely they will find cancer. Why? Because at this point in my life what the hell does one more cancer matter? That's honestly how I look at it as odd as that seems. I'm already condemned to spend what is left of my life getting cut open time and time again because of cancer so what is one more form and one more surgery? I think I'm just desensitized to it at this point is all. I'm also going to ask about getting a hysterectomy either way because I'm sick of the pain from endometriosis all the time. I'm done having babies so take the baby factory out and let me get on with my life! Leave me an ovary though because I'll be damned if I'm taking even MORE pills for the rest of my life! lol No preaching about risk of ovary cancer either. I'll take my chances at this point.

After that I get to chaperone the kids' Science Class at the museum. I stink at chaperoning but that was part of the deal and I only have to do it twice so I can't complain much. As soon as that is finished then it's off to the library for crafts. Once we get home, I have to do some school stuff and have Big B do his TA time with Lil Man. I also have to do some work on my book and start planning my children's book. But according to the hubby I don't do anything. Yeah, bite me buddy!

The kids are good, Big B's birthday is coming up next month and thanks to his donor actually paying his support intermittently (and me saving it anytime it comes), it looks like Big B will get a guitar for his birthday. I figure if he ends up not learning to play it like he says then I can always claim it for homeschooling and try to learn how to play it again myself. lol. Yes, once upon a time I played guitar. I quit though because having to restring a right handed guitar for my lefty self was a pain in the ass. Of course, that was back when lefty guitars cost alot more than regular ones. Now the price difference isn't so bad.

Sis wants to take some form of dance but that is on hold until she can do her chores consistantly. We got her a Hope Chest a few weeks ago though and it's cute seeing her windowshop for household items she wants to put in it. When we bring out the Yule and Christmas decorations this December, I will be giving her all the ornaments I've bought for her every year for the last 12 years. She will then keep them in the chest for when she moves out and has her own tree to hang them on. I always wanted a hope chest but my mother never thought enough of me to get one (big shock there I know). I figured it's the least I can do for my only girl and it will create memories and a bond between us that she will have always.

Lil Man wants to be in karate. That one scares me because I have a feeling he will use his powers for evil and try to take over the world! He may be cute but that's just a ploy to throw you off. He's bent on world domination I tell you! :) Other than that he's just a very verbal regular ornery three year old. He's also hit a very lovey stage right now where he constantly tells everyone he loves them. It's so cute! He also is potty-trained!! YAY! We haven't tested it out in public too much but the few times we have he has done wonderfully. He wears a diaper at bedtime still but here resently he has been dry in the mornings so that is the next thing to go. Accidents are very few and far between for him and I'm just so proud! All we did was let him go at his own pace and as he was ready. So much easier than back when I thought I had to push the oldest two to be trained by a certain time.

So that's about it here. All my babies are growing up and I'm feeling old. How did I go from being a young teen mom with the whole world in front of me to an old cancer filled lady having to take things day by day? Father Time is such a weiner!

Monday, March 06, 2006

Happy Birthday To Me... Blah Blah Blah

Who has time for birthdays? I know I sure don't.

First I thought the crappy life, cancer, and disorder were bad karma from another life. I figured I was probably Bonnie (Bonnie and Clyde) in my last life and must pay for it in this one.

Now though I know that this busy hectic life I'm leading now is payback for all the "I wish I just had a life" complaining I use to do! All I had to do to get a life was start homeschooling. Who knew?

I have no time to celebrate my birthday today. This morning I have to take the little guy to his first Rhythm & Movement class, then come home and fix a very quick lunch so I can shoot back out the door to take the older two to their Science Class. While they are in class I have to go to Walgreen's and pick up some prescriptions, then to the dollar store for sand toys for lil man for park days, and then back to pick up the oldest two heathens. THEN it's off to the library to pick up the books I have on hold, home to start some schoolwork that we really do need to get done, make dinner, bathe the monkeyboy, have everyone do their chores, clean the living room, finish up the schoolwork, read to the kids, and then collapse in a heap on the floor.

I will be so damn tired I won't know if I'm 31 or 81, whether it's 10am or 10pm, and I sure as hell won't know if I just got back or if I'm on my way out! The hubby will be sleeping the day away (he works graveyards) while I'm doing all this. I want his job! Especially since if you ask him he will tell you that I don't do anything all day. *eyeroll*

I'm happy I've made it another year so I could enjoy my kids. That is celebration enough don't you think? Sounds pretty great to me.

Oh who am I kidding? Mama's hittin' the wine bottle tonight! Even if it makes me sick (damn medications!) at least I'll have fun getting there! Whose bringing the margaritas and Crown & Coke?

Trying To Lose Weight Sucks!

I turn 31 years old tomorrow and thanks to all the health/cancer bull I think my 85 year old great-grandmother by marriage has more energy than I do. My husband tells me to exercise. My doctor tells me to try exercise. I'm telling THEM to bite me! You have to have energy and not be getting sick constantly in order to exercise there boys. lol Also, my husband is the last person on earth to tell someone else to exercise. ppffftttt

The hubby has lost around 15lbs by doing nothing more than drinking two Red Bulls a day, taking 1000mg of CLA, and walking a few laps around the hangar at work. On one hand I am happy for him. On the other I want to push him off the roof. :D Everyday he comes up to me bragging about how lose his pants are getting and blah blah blah. I try to be a supportive spouse but ohhhh he's pushing it!

In less than 6 months I gained 30lbs thanks to steroids (to replace my adrenal glands not to pump up! lmao) mostly. It was very depressing considering before that I weighed 153lbs at 6' tall. That's a good weight and I had a pretty nice body. Packing on all that weight and not fitting into clothes I had fit into for years despite three pregnancies was just a real downer. Three different doctors have told me that I have next to no chance of losing the weight either. Pass the Zoloft this way would ya? lol

My biggest hangup is soda. I spent most of my life easily consuming a two liter of Wild Cherry Pepsi in a little over a day. I don't eat much so most of my calories came from soda. I would have three full 24oz glasses a day at the very least. More if I was stressed. So I cut out all soda a few weeks ago and started kind of doing what the hubby does. I started drinking one Red Bull a day and taking two 1000mg CLA tablets a day. I'm hoping to start doing exercise once some of my pain issues are taken care of (either doctor care or really good meds. hehe) but for now I just stick with my usual schedule.

I am happy to say that at this point I have lost 3lbs since I started. It's not much but it's something and it's a start right?

I figure if this doesn't work I ditch the hubby and pull an Anna Nicole Smith aka marry some old guy so I can afford lipo. Hey, if she can do it then I sure as hell can too! I'm much better than her though because I don't do drugs so I won't be strung out and I won't blow the money on taking my assistant to female strip clubs for lap dances! I can also cook and come with three darling tax deductions. Anybody have a rich single relative? Anyone?

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

I'm Lovin' It!

No, not stupid McDonalds. LOL. I'm lovin' all the wonderful blogs I've found lately. The wonderful Ms Meg pointed me to Doc and Missy's blogs which in turn led me to several others and they are all so much fun reading. Real blogs by Real women and not a bunch of fluff and crap!

I honestly think I could sit in a room or on a back porch with these women and have so much fun talking. Many of them are cancer survivors or moms living with cancer. Most are homeschoolers. Several are blunt and sarcastic just like me. One even cleans her house which of course ticks me off (out of pure jealousy mind you) but she makes me laugh too so I forgive her. ;) Bringing beer to the porch is optional. Wine is a must but since all alcohol makes me sick make sure it's the good stuff because I'll be damned if I'm getting sick for Arbor Mist!

Anyway-I just invaded their cozy little circle and instead of verbally beating me over the head they have welcomed me. It's nice as sappy as that sounds. It's nice to not feel alone or feel like I have to hide who I really am (a potty mouthed, opinionated, ranting, sometimes...okay so most times sheeesh... bitch) because these women will understand.

If you haven't checked out the links I have to the side please do. I promise you won't be disapointed. Well unless you're that one thumping wanker who thinks I'm angry at life. Then all the cursing, bitching, and honesty might cause you to need extra time with your Bible. HA!

Speaking of Bibles. Meg, you KNEW I would love this link and I just can't help posting it. If it offends you well sorry. For the record, Praise Hems offend my eyes so now we're even. :p

And speaking of Meg, I conned her into starting a blog of her own. I'm looking forward to seeing what she posts when she gets back mid-month. No pressure Meg. None at all. *evil grin*