Thursday, September 11, 2008

Our Darkest Day- My 9/11 Tribute

This is a poem I wrote seven years ago today as I watched the events of 9/11 unfold. I'm afraid it's a very raw poem and not very "professional" but it was my heart that day. My heart hurt for those who had so suddenly lost loved ones, hatred took root as I wondered what kind of monsters could be that sick and demented, and fear took hold as I worried if my children were now suddenly in danger.

"Our Darkest Day" was published a year later in the book "911: The Day America Cried". All proceeds benefit the Todd Beamer Foundation & I am proud to say I did not receive a single penny of any of it! :)

Our Darkest Day

Somewhere today a child cries
For a mother who’ll never come home
A wife waiting to hear from her mate
Sits shaking by the phone.

A sister thinks about words she said
And knows she can’t take back
A brother screams out ‘Why us God?!’
As dust settles from the attack

In streets usually alive with bustle
Now silence and sirens are all that’s heard
Families looking for signs of hope
Just waiting for a word.

In the shadows of a tragedy
A nation is mourning from sea to sea
Who could have done such an awful thing?
God, who can this demon be?

So many questions left unanswered
So much pain left to be felt
But as a nation we swear to our dead
That justice will be dealt.

For they may have struck a horrible blow
But they failed to remember one thing
That even on our Darkest Day
The bells of Liberty ring.

Jolene Coiner
© Jolene Coiner Burzycki

Monday, September 08, 2008

Ugh, I Suck

I know I haven't posted anything in awhile and I know it's hard to want to read here when I never fucking post BUT I've felt like total ass for almost a month now. I can't even pinpoint it down to one certain thing either... I just feel like out and out ass.

Some good news is that I've finally found a good rheumatologist and she is truly awesome! The only downside is that she is the third rheum to confirm that I have fibromyalgia (when others are having a hard time getting ONE doc to diagnose them I've got three! HA) and she even called it, "Very bad fibromyalgia". *sigh* Dammit.

I'm behind on everything at this point. I have reviews that are past overdue, blog posts on my blogs that should go up sometime this century, and I even have fucking snail mail letters that I owe some good friends! The only thing I'm not behind on is laundry and that's just because my daughter gets all weird if she doesn't have clean clothes. *snicker*

Tomorrow I have an abdominal ultrasound to look for a reason why I get sick everytime I eat and any day now I should find out when my next cancer scans are so we can see if the rotten little bastards have gotten any bigger in my lungs and neck. Personally I could give a shit less because the answer is still the same whether they've grown or not. Blah.

My cancer marker is all over the place as well. One test it's higher and then the next test it's a little lower. Not even that can be normal. haha

While I'm sure this post comes across as depressed I'm actually feeling really sarcastic so if you read it as alot of sarcasm then you've got my mood. I gave up being depressed over this crap awhile ago and now I just get snotty about it. I figure you can either laugh, cry, or just stick your middle finger in the air and say "screw you". I'm more of a "screw you" kinda gal myself how about you?