Happy Birthday To My MonkeyBoy
Today my youngest child, my baby, turns FOUR years old! I've honestly already cried twice today and it's not even noon here yet! lol
The years have gone by entirely too fast and it seems like just yesterday I was pushing against his foot as he kicked inside my stomach. *sniff* Now he's that gorgeous child you see on the left side of my banner up there. His smile alone can melt your heart and when he says "Are you happy at me?", you are lost forever.
My MonkeyBoy is a healthy, tall, skinny blonde haired blue-eyed boy who loves to talk, walks on his tiptoes like his Daddy, and can tell the names and facts of over 20 different dinosaurs. He loves watching the Animal Planet and Discovery Science channels as well as Little Einstein's whenever he can catch it. His brother and sister are his best friends and the love/don't like relationship between the three of them is every mother's dream. My oldest two children would give their lives for their little brother and in return MonkeyBoy gives his undying devotion and love.
My youngest child has made me fall in love with all three of my kids all over again. Just watching him over the last four years grow, love, and learn has reminded me of when the older two were little. I've watched them all interact and it has brought me closer to my preteen and teen when I thought my attachment issues would push them away. They all try me at times but in the end I fall more in love with them everyday and realize more and more what fantastic people all three of them are.
When MonkeyBoy was born I knew our "circle" was complete. I didn't yearn for another child or even consider having another one. MonkeyBoy was the final piece to our puzzle and I felt so complete and fulfilled at that moment. Big B and Sis were there with me all through labour and at the birth (although they stepped outside during the actual birthing part) as well. They saw their baby brother right after he came into the world and have been by his side ever since. I couldn't ask for a better big brother and sister for MonkeyBoy than the two he has.
I have changed so much from when I had my first two children. I breastfed MonkeyBoy until he was a little over 2 years old (and only stopped because of my cancer surgery). I carried him around in a baby sling (and always wandered where these things were when I had the first two!) everywhere we went. He has slept in bed with his father and I from day one and it has been such a wonderful experience. It's nice having him to snuggle with while Daddy is working graveyard shift. On the weekend he clings to Daddy in his sleep and even tosses an adorable little arm around his neck as he rolls over. Almost always this is followed by a look of deep love and a kiss by Daddy before he goes back to sleep. Soon he will have his own bed and his own room but for now he's our snuggle buddy and my little personal heater. lol
Today my youngest baby is four and later today he will open a few presents, have a mini Cinnamon Swirl bundt cake to celebrate his special day, and watch a movie tonight of his choosing. He had heart shaped toast with PB&J for breakfast (his request) and hot cocoa. Tonight we will have spaghetti for his special dinner and on Saturday a few friends are coming over to have Bug Mountain Cake and ice cream plus he'll get the rest of his presents then too.
To me this day is huge but to him (because of his age) it's just another day. He's enjoying getting away with little things today like playing his VSmile, tooting on his sister and laughing about it, and currently running around half naked. To him this is what a birthday is about. He doesn't feel or look any different when he looks in the mirror.
I see a baby becoming a child. I see chubby little hands becoming sure and steady child hands. I see the baby with the serious face when you talked to him becoming a serious child who explores his world to the fullest asking questions every step of the way. I see.... one of the most amazing people I've ever met in my life.
I use to worry about whether or not anyone would remember me after I die but now when I look at my children I could care less because I now know that after I'm gone there will still be three perfect parts of me sharing their love and wonder for life with others. They complete me and I've never felt more at peace in my life than I do today... on one of my baby's birthdays.
Happy Birthday, MonkeyBoy! I will do my best to make sure that I am here to celebrate many many more with you. I love you and adore you more everyday and thank you for choosing me to be your mommy.