Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Who Said Latin Was Boring?

At least it's not when you go on the internet while drinking a glass of wine looking for phrases for a tattoo and end up HERE. Latin is a fun language dammit! Just look that page! Oh and boy am I glad I found that site because now I have new ways of saying things in my everyday life. Things like...

"O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!"- Which translates to "Oh! More! Go on! Yes! Ooh! Ummm!". PERFECT for the next time I get a facial done at the spa! *snicker*

"Ascendo tuum" - Which means "Up yours!" for the guy who cut me off on the I-25 interchange the other day!

How about- "Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem" which means "In the good old days, children like you were left to perish on windswept crags!" for that snotty little brat you can't stand at playgroup? Come on, ya know ya wanna!

Do you think I could make the checkout line at Albertson's shorter if I yell out "Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam" (I have a catapult. Give me all your money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head!)? With my luck someone behind me would know Latin and just start laughing. Until I dropped a rock on the bitch's head that is. :)

"Estne tibi forte magna feles fulva et planissima? (Do you by chance happen to own a large, yellowish, very flat cat?)- I am soooooooooo sorry. What the hell was he doing hiding under my van anyway? Well at least now you know the coyotes didn't eat him right?

And last but not least, the next time you have dinner at the In-laws and you have no clue what the hell it is your mother-in-law just served you, know that you can now safely say "Hocine bibo aut in eum digitos insero?" (Do I drink this or stick my fingers in it?) without causing your husband to be left out of her will. Unless she happens to frequent the same Latin site, and in that case you're just plain "Raptus regaliter" aka royally screwed.

Have fun with your new fun phases dears and if you find one that you find especially funny please share with a comment. Meanwhile, I'll be over here getting another glass of wine and deciding what phrases to teach the children next week.


Anonymous said...

That is very funny. I'll hafta play around over there to get some good sayings of my own!

Anonymous said...

This is fun! See, I knew I should have taken Latin in high school... it IS practical!

Steven said...

Fling your enormous rock! Come on! BRING IT ON! ;)


Emma said...

Hi Jo, I haven't popped by in a while and was pleased to see you're back blogging :-)

Hoping you're keeping well.
Much love

Mom of All Seasons said...

Finally, a way to politely say, "Enough already, get off my back about the religious crap, dearest mother-in-law."