Things A Parent Probably SHOULDN'T Say To Their Kid:

Im backkkkkkkk! The blogging bug has hit me recently and I figure its about damn time I do something about it! So I will set the stage for how this blog is going to go with my first post. If you are easily offended then this blog isn't for you. If you like sarcasm, aren't bothered by a potty mouth that would make Dane Cook cringe, and like to laugh then Hello my friend!

Things A Parent Probably SHOULDN'T Say To Their Kid:

1) "Quit talking and GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP!"

2) "Ignore your father, he's an idiot"

3) "Your grandmother is a psychotic whore" (my egg donor)

4) "Don't go in his house, he's probably a fucking pedophile!" (A neighbor)

5) "Tell your father to quit being an asshole, but don't SAY asshole you're not allowed"

6) "That kid ever touches you again punch him in the throat!"

7) "If your AWANAS leader tells you one more time that we should all get baptized, tell her Mommy worships Satan and the only reason she lets you come to AWANAS is because she thinks its a scout troop that allows gays. Nevermind don't say that!"

And last but not least...

"See that kid over there? Don't act like him because he's acting like a douchebag. He's one worth ganking" (Ganking is a word that my 10 year old and I picked up off our favorite show, Supernatural. It means kill on the show but mostly we use it as a way to say they need hushed up).

Our First Relay For Life

I remember when I use to love to write whether it was an article, blog, or journaling. Nowadays I just can't seem to put my thoughts down. It sucks because writing was such a large part of who I am at one point.

Anyway- last night Sis, MonkeyBoy, and I took part in our very first Relay for Life! I'm so glad we did because I had a chance to see and watch so many great survivors and families.

Sis and I each received a "Survivor" t-shirt to wear all evening which was cool. It was also very humbling and to be honest made me feel a little uncomfortable because I don't feel like I have survived anything. The cancer is still there. I'll never be rid of it so am I really a survivor? They also gave MonkeyBoy a "Caregiver" shirt as well so he was so proud all night long. It was really cute!

At the event we enjoyed music, dinner, chatting with others, games, watched an awards ceremony, listened to speakers, made memorial luminaries, walked the Survivor Lap, and then they had a beautiful closing ceremony.

Of course, I got sick as a dog and am wiped out today because it was so hot (the no adrenal glands thing) but it was definitely worth it!

We bought memorial luminaries for my father, Darling Vincent Smith, and also the kids' other grandpa, William Fritsche. It made MB and I both cry to pass them on our lap around the track. It still seems like they were here just yesterday and we feel such a loss because they were both amazing men.

So we will be going every year from now on and I encourage others to go as well. It is an eye opening, humbling, and beautiful experience that you shouldn't miss.

Learning To Be Thankful

Growing up, Thanksgiving was anything but picturesque and filled with family togetherness. At our house the holiday was filled with mean comments about the food, complaints about family, and the only thing to be thankful for was if we actually made it to dessert without a fight. It always made me wonder if this was how holidays were truly meant to be.

Once I grew up and had my own family I realized that it could be so much more. The holidays became something I looked forward to. Thanksgiving finally became a day of good food, wonderful company, and thankfully no fists were ever thrown. I was able to teach my children all the things that I yearned for as a child- to be thankful for all the things we had and not focus on what we didn’t.

This year is very special to us in that we have so much to be thankful for. As a family we have made it through several cancers, surgeries, adjusting to living with a rare disorder, the loss of a loved one, and a job transfer that took us on a move across country. It’s been both hard and busy to say the least.

We can now truly say we know the meaning of being thankful. Having to go through our own trials has opened our eyes a little wider to the hardships of others. Our thoughts can’t help but be with the victims of this year’s hurricanes and tornadoes. The words “thank you” don’t seem like enough to show our gratitude to the brave men and women serving our country both at home and abroad. Joy hardly begins to describe what I feel knowing that I am alive and able to listen to my children do something so simple as argue over what float in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade is best.

I can’t say I don’t wish my childhood memories of the holidays weren’t better. I’d love to have the traditions and warmth from generations before to pass on to my kids but that isn’t something we will ever have and that’s okay. Instead they will grow up knowing they were a part of making many new traditions that we can all cherish and pass on to the generations to come.

The love, true thankfulness, and heartfelt giving begins with us. The past can never touch the joy and togetherness we have now. Oh there still might be a fight or two but it will most likely be started by a hungry three year old who just wants the last piece of pie. The rest of the day though will be filled with the giggles of five goofy people trying to cuddle on one little couch.

"Average Joe" heroes

 As a little girl, my heroes were Wonder Woman and my cool third-grade teacher with the wild hair. Later, they changed to people like Amelia Earhart, Joan of Arc, and Eleanore Roosevelt. Okay so I still thought Wonder Woman was da bomb too! When I became an adult though, I quit having heroes. There just wasn't anyone who inspired me anymore.

Then I read the story of Kent and Melony on a parenting board I was on at the time. Melony was the mother of fivc (three by birth and two adopted), a talented artist, and she designed the most adorable outfits for kids. From a distance this woman seemed to live a perfectly charmed life. She just seemed so happy and on top of the world. Soon though I found out how truly amazing her story and life really were.

You see, Kent was fighting a Stage 4 cancer and it had been a pretty rough fight for him. Each update told of a body that was getting weaker yet a soul that was still burning brightly and fighting for all it was worth. Neither of them ever complained about anything and Melony spoke of Kent with  so much love that you could actually feel it yourself. Kent showed his love by fighting and refusing to leave his family. All this and more is why they will eternally be my heroes.

Kent taught me that I can never give up because the bottom line is that it's not really about me. It's about my family and loved ones who still need me. I learned to always keep my sense of humor thanks to him. I know now that if he could laugh, smile, and joke with all he was up against then there's no reason I couldn't do the same.

Through Melony, I finally witnessed unconditional love, unwavering faith, and the very epitome of grace. She is the kind of woman I dream of one day being. She never spoke of how hard this must all be on her but instead told about every wonderful and encouraging thing Kent did. 

Thanks to Kent and his amazing sidekick, Melony, I have heroes once again. Even though they don't wear masks, tights, or long flowing capes, my "Average Joe" heroes still save the day. And the greatest part of all is that all they had to do was keep being themselves.

*Footnote* Kent passed away at home holding his wife's hand on September 23, 2005. He is sorely missed and will always be "Superman" to myself and many others.

Real-world Wonder Women

Do you know that television’s Wonder Woman, Lynda Carter, left acting for several years to stay home and raise her two children? I mention this because to me, when Ms. Carter stopped “playing” Wonder Woman on TV she then took on the role of a lifetime: Motherhood. That is when she became a real life Wonder Woman.

We moms may not have bulletproof wrist cuffs (can you imagine doing dishes in those?), a magic lasso (though it would come in handy for wild children), or an Invisible Jet (how many carseats could fit in that thing anyway?) but who needs fancy accessories? We moms come specially equipped with many extraordinary superpowers like:

-Magic Kisses: Our magic mommy kisses can heal booboos, vanquish bad dreams, stop tears, and charm grumpy husbands.

-Soft Arms: These amazing arms provide safety from closet monsters, lovingly snuggle many children at once, and one hug can make all sadness in a child’s world just melt away.

-Super Senses: Every mommy comes standard with this awesome power. We can hear mischievous whispers from two rooms away, know a lie the moment it leaves our child's (or husband’s) lips, see through the back of our heads, and we always know who wrote on the wall without ever asking. Nothing gets past our super senses!

As mothers, our powers are endless. While TV’s Wonder Woman did a wonderful job of teaching a generation of girls about strength and self-worth, today’s real life Wonder Women go even further. We are raising the male and female “superheroes” of tomorrow. The future of the world truly rests in our hands.

So Lynda Carter’s character can keep the costume and fancy extras, for us real world Wonder Women they’d just get in the way. From the moment we hear our child’s first cry of life we instantly have everything we’ll ever need. How could a piece of rope top that?

Okay so maybe we really would love one of those bustier’s with the “W’s” on it for date night with the hubby, but that’ll just be our little secret.

What “superpowers” do you possess (or wish you did)?

*I wrote this for DotMom many years ago and just happened to find it again. Since I'm considering blogging once more I thought I would post this while I contemplate.*

My Five Year Anniversary

On October 7th, 2004 I was diagnosed with medullary thyroid cancer. Shortly thereafter I was told that someone with it spread as much as mine had was given a 16% statistical chance of making it to 5 years. One doctor told me not to listen to statistics so since then I haven't but I can't help but be excited that...

I've made it to FIVE YEARS!!!!!

I can not even begin to express how excited I am about this. Honestly I never thought the cancer itself would kill me before the five year mark but all the other medical stuff has had me worried. The lack of adrenal glands can get pretty scary (almost dying last year was quite traumatizing) and had me wondering if it was going to cause my time to be up. Making it five more years means my body might be scarred, broken, in pain all the time, and sickly but my spirit is holding it all together just fine. I can't wait for my TEN year anniversary. *smile*

So I just want to thank all my friends who have been with me on this ride. Thank you for the calls, gifts, quilts, love, cards, thoughts, and prayers. You have no idea how much they have meant to me. Thank you for listening to me rant and yes, even cry. Thank you for not giving up even though I know some of you have been scared to death.

Here's to another five years. And then another... and another... and another.... haha.

Wow, An Award!!

When you don't blog constantly like you use to you come to expect certain things NOT happening like not having alot of readers anymore, fewer comments, less writing offers, and definitely fewer awards from other bloggers because well... you're not blogging about anything now are you? LOL

Well Melanie at Running Without Being Chased thought of me when it was time for her to pass on the Queen of Awe-Summm award which totally blew me away. Thank you very much, Melanie for completely making my day. I feel so cool again now. :)

The steps to becoming a Queen are...1. List Seven Things That Make You Awe-Summm!

2. Pass the award on to seven bloggers you read religiously.

3. Tag those seven bloggers.


Seven Things That Make Me Awe-summm-
oh boy this is going to be hard because I don't think of myself as awesome. Hmmmm.

1- I have awe-summm genes when it comes to my kids. They look like me, act like me, and even have my sarcastic sense of humor rather than their donor's (hubby not included) ugly, bland, ignorant ass stupidity. *snort* Yes, I'm taking credit for having the stronger genes in this case so shup!!

2- I have awe-summm friends who make me more awe-summm just by knowing them. I feel very lucky when it comes to my friends.

3- Despite a screwed up childhood I've turned out fairly normal which I think is pretty awe-summm.

4- I am an awe-summm left-handed person. We lefties are in a league of our own I tell ya (okay so we're weird shup!).

5- I'm able to always have a sense of humor no matter what life throws at me. Hell, I even joke about cancer leasing space in my body. I RULE!!! Just kidding, maybe this award is affecting my ego. Dammit!

6- Speaking of which, it is majorly fucking awe-summm that this October will mark FIVE years that I've been living with cancer. Statistics have had me at a 16% chance of making it this far since the beginning but I've always known that as long as this shit keeps it's hands off my bones, I'll be kicking for awhile yet. *smile*

7- I think it's pretty damn awe-summm that I actually made it through all seven of these! LMFAO.


Okay now it's time to pass the award on to some of my fave ladies...

Doc- Totally fucking awesome I tell you!

Meg- Awesome lady I had the privilege to get to know before she moved back to Indiana.

Robin- Awesome sarcastic knitting bitch whom I adore

Rayne- Even when I didn't post she still read my blog. So awesome!

Jessica- My awesome Mormon Puddin' Pop

Jami- She awesomely rocks my socks and her blog kicks ass!

Summer- She's wired for awesomeness!

So here's your award bitches. Don't say I never give ya anything. HAHA

Time To Start Living Again

I'm almost ashamed to admit that I have become somewhat of a hermit ever since my neck surgery in 2005. At first I hid away because I got tired of people staring at my neck all the time and just didn't want to have to face them. After that I pulled back even more from society because I was grumpy and in no mood to put up with people who were stupid or petty. Eventually pain was what kept me home more often than anything else and instead of fighting that I just let it.

It hasn't been fair to my kids because alot of the time they are trapped in this house with me. I'm not saying I cut us all off from the rest of the world or anything but since we moved outside of town we've not been going out and exploring as much. I hate that and miss our adventures. The kids still play outside, go to the park, take walks, etc but going into town hasn't been as often.

Now Big B is starting college and Sis is starting at the charter school which means that it will mostly just be MonkeyBoy and I from now on. I plan on filling the year with new adventures but I've also realized that I need to start making adventures for myself as well.

So on that thought I have signed up for a Tai Chi class on Tuesday evenings at the local Community Center ($2 a class how could I NOT?) and Bellydancing class at a studio on Wednesday evenings. I have to travel an hour and a half round trip for the Bellydancing class but I've decided that it's worth it and I deserve it. *smile* My rheumotologist has recommended Tai Chi before so that should be good for the fibro and maybe bellydancing will loosen some of the stiff muscles up a little so I can have more mobility.

Of course, I could just end up in even more pain too. I think it's worth a try and worst case I start but have to stop to keep pain at bay. I won't really be any worse off than I am now and hopefully I will be better off than now so it's worth it.

I chose Tai Chi because it has fluid movements that won't jerk my body around causing more pain plus I'm hoping it will help me with meditation and focus. I chose bellydancing because it looks like fun and if I'm going to be stuck in this body then I might as well learn to like it a little more right?

I hope that once I start shakin' my hips I'll be able to get the damn things to STOP cuz mama's fanny has more volume than it use to! Just kidding. Not about the volume but the stopping part. *snicker*

So wish me luck and I might post pics of Tai Chi but don't even ask about the other! Ha Ha.